‘The Squashbuckler Diaries’ are the daily tales of Joy Shelley’s Life in the Dream. The ‘Lost in Dreams’ books will tell the story of what happens to her at ages 6, 9, 12, 15, and so on. The diaries tell us what happens before, after, and between the books.

S02E16 Joy’s Morning, Part 1: Bathroom Break

Joy brings Bonny’s Revenge back to the ocean and docks right in front of our apartment. Charlie’s eyes can’t stop dancing around. He’s seen so many new worlds, been flown to space, and all with his new friend piloting a flying warship. 

“Hold on, Charlie,” Joy says and walks away. 

I look at her, and so do Suzy, Justin, Charlie, and Master Mind. 

She jumps up on the plank and walks right to the edge. 

“Joy…” Suzy begins to whisper, feeling it’s dangerous, but stops herself.

Then Joy begins to take off her pants, and everyone in a chorus says, “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” and “Joy!” and “Whoa there!” It was actually everyone but Master Mind, but you get the idea.

Joy freezes, looking at us. “What?” 

“Joy. Joy,” Justin rushes over to her. “We have people here. Actual people. You can’t go to the bathroom like that.” 

Suzy’s eyes shrink. “What do you mean go to the bathroom? Does she just go in the--” 

But Joy’s talking over her, “Why not?” 

“Well, uh, it’s because you have to protect your, uh,” Justin seems to be struggling. He’s been a parent for a long time, but he hasn’t taken care of simple things like this, “Oh, uh, what’s it called?” 

“Your private parts,” Suzy says. 

“That’s it!” 

“What do you mean?” Joy asks.

“Well, now that there are people around, you can’t just take off your clothes like that. Also, now you're older, so you can’t just take off your clothes like that.” 

“Why not?” 

Suzy shoots Justin a look. 

“Because, dearie,” she walks over to the plank and offers a hand. “The older you get, the more you understand how private your private parts are.” 

Joy takes her hand and jumps back to the deck. 

“Is there a bathroom here, Justin?” Suzy asks. 

Justin looks around the deck. He takes his time, as if realizing for the first time what’s missing. “Uh… No.”

“Maybe you should fix that,” Suzy says coldly. “Dearie, there’s a bathroom in our apartment. Let me show you.” 

Justin extends the ramp and Suzy and Joy walk down. “Have you ever used a bathroom, dearie?” 

“Lots o’times!” 

“Good! Good!”

I can see on Joy, as Suzy leads her into our apartment, that this is a new world for her, and that she enjoys being shown it by her grandmother. 

“Oh!” Charlie suddenly says. “She asked for an ocean or a bathroom! I get it now!” 

—Told by Grampa Walt

S02E17 Joy’s Morning, Part 2: That’s One Dollar

S02E015 Joy’s World, Part 3: Outer Space