The Lost In Dreams Universe

View Original

#279: Ye Olde Weapons Shoppe, Part 2: The Taser

Dragon Father landed Bonny’s Revenge on a familiar meteor that appeared out of nowhere. 

I recognized it immediately, even though I had only seen it once, during my early days in Dragon Father’s dreams. 

It was a small meteor, the size of four of their ships, or slightly smaller than four dragons. It consisted of a parking lot to one side, a landing bay for ships on the other, and then a long store with a wooden sign hanging above it: Ye Olde Weapons Shoppe. 

I do not know why two of the words are misspelled, but I never learned proper grammar or spelling. I only know what I have seen, what I have heard, and of that only what I remember. 

Dragon Little was excited to go into the store again. She was 3 years old this time. 

“Joy. Do NOT touch anything,” Dragon Father warned her ahead of time. 

“A-ha,” she nodded happily. 

“No, no, you’re not hearing me,” he said again and slower. “Do not touch ANY of the weapons. Not those you like. Not those you don’t like. You don’t touch the shelves. You don’t touch the lights. You don’t touch the people. You. Touch. Nothing.” 

“A-ha,” she nodded just as happily, eyes sparkling. 

“A-ha,” he seemed to lack confidence in her words. “What did I just say?” 

“Ah… Don’t touch… something?” 

“I’m going to say this again. Look into my eyes and listen.” 

And so he explained it to her for five minutes before they landed, trying to get her to listen in spite of her enthusiasm. 

Once in the store, I could no longer see them, but my sharp dragon ears heard them very well.

“What’s that? What’s that? What’s that? What’s that?” 

Dragon Father explained every item, what it does, usually adding, “That’s not something swashbucklers use, Joy.” 

And then they came upon the Taser. 

“It shoots electricity? Like laser.” 

”Not like laser. Laser is light. This makes your whole body hurt and your muscles spasm and…” 

“I want it!” 

“That is not a weapon swashbucklers use, Joy.” 

“I want it! 

“Joy, put it down. Put it down, Joy!” 

“How does it work?” 

“Don’t! It’s dangerous! It’s dangerous! It’s--” 

I heard the ‘click’. I heard something spring. I heard something almost immediately crackle with a sort of ‘bzzzzz’ and I heard Dragon Little moan. 

“Jesus,” I heard Dragon Father say. 

The crackle stopped. 

“Joy, Joy, are you all right?” 

“Uh huh…” she answered, but she was clearly recovering from a shocking trauma to her body. 

“Look at me. Look at me!” he was angry. “You never, never touch a weapon you don’t understand! You never, never touch a weapon when I say don’t! Never!” 

He was breathing hard. He continued, “Now go back to the ship! You don’t get anything from this store! I’m buying you nothing! Go home and wait for me!” 

There was silence. Then I heard Dragon Little stand up and slowly walk outside without comment. Her head was down and she appeared sad. 

She went to Bonny’s Revenge and climbed the rope. 

She waited for her father for half an hour. He came back with a box full of new weapons for himself. 

He went wordlessly to the wheel and Bonny’s Revenge rose into outer space. 

As before, the meteor with the store disappeared. But only my sharp eyes could see in the emptiness of space a small, tiny taser gun roll endlessly away from earth. 

—Told by The Red Dragon